Dearest Rachel,
Until I met you I had pretty much given up on falling in love and wanting a family. I wanted to start this blog off with a song by Oleander. "I Walk Alone" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDoiZc25t-k&ob=av2e Rachel you were my best friend and the when I met you I felt I didn't have to walk this earth alone anymore. God always walks with us but we are human beings and we desire attention, companionship, and most of all love. I didn't want to give my love to anyone I only wanted to give it to the best. I still believe in you. I hope that if you read this that you share this with your family. If anyone made you feel like you shouldn't be with me I hope they really take a look at this and realize how much I love you. If you are having second thoughts about me and thinking if it would be worthwhile to pick up the phone and talk to me or even a text I am ready. I still have the same number. Your name and your text are still in my phone and if you have a new number all you have to do is text me "I AM READY" and we can start the healing process. I will know it is you and it would probably bring the biggest smile to my face in a year. When my mom died I was still happy Rachel because I had you and Jonathan to love. I think one reason she held on so long is that she wanted to see me happy. She loved you even though she never got to know you and she saw the glow I had when I talked about you and Jonathan. Rachel you and Jonathan were my world and what I wanted to live for. I wanted to live a life walking with Christ with you two. Have you ever noticed that this whole time I always say how much I love you and your son? It is true. That was one thing that hurt me the most is that I truly think your kid is special and I really wanted to help raise him with you. When I gave him a hug the day I left and he asked me to send him some more Legos all I wanted to do is keep my promise. I was going to send both Jonathan and Riley a big Lego house each. I love kids and I wanted to love your family. I hope that your family knows that too. I haven't given up on you because I truly love you Rachel Myatt. It was always about your friendship to me and mine to you. I didn't want you because of your looks, I didn't care what you did for a living, I didn't want you to sleep with you. Rachel I loved you and was and am in love with you. You were all I desired and you were the one that set my heart and soul on fire. I wanted to give you all of me. I am sorry that my mom died at such an inopportune time but she wanted me to go on living and loving. If I truly had of felt it wasn't best to come see you at the time I wouldn't but I gave myself three weeks. Each day is precious to me. When my mother died I only took 1 day off of work the day after she died and went right back. My father and brother took a couple weeks off. I can't sit around when there are people to love, help, and things to do. My mother wouldn't want it that way. One thing she did want is for me to love you and believe in you. I did and I still do. I don't know what else I can say to convince you to come back to my heart sister. All I know is that I love you and if you haven't seen through all of this that I love you unconditionally. After all that was done and said I still want to have you as my best friend. I would still take you back as a girlfriend. I love you and Jonathan with all my heart and if you cant see how pure and true my love is and has always been for you its your loss. Im going to keep writing, keep praying, and keep putting my faith in God. He has never let me down and answered all my prayers. He answered my prayer the day I met you because I had the most beautiful, kind, loving person place in my life and I still believe she is there and I still care for you very much. He never said it would be easy but I put my trust in Him that you will recieve me into your life again and that your family will accept me and know that what I have done and I have been doing is only because I love you from the deepest regions of my heart, without shame, hesitation, and unwaivering. I love you and Jonathan as my own flesh and if you are still scared of that kind of love then you don't have to be. Rachel I want to be with you again. I wanted to be the humble servant of you and Jonathan and spend the rest of my days with my best friend and her loved ones . That was the sacrifice I wanted to make and become closer to the Lord in doing so. I miss you and I wish you and your family the Myatts and Friesens nothing but blessings today. Most of all Bless you and Jonathan I love you, I need you both, I care for you.
Love B,
James 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble and oppressed.”
1 Peter 3:8[ Suffering for Doing Good ] Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.
Rachel think about how much more courage it takes to admit your wrong doing and apologize to the people you love then it does to ignore them and let problems build up. I apologized to you and I have been truly sorry for hurting you. I am repentant in the Lord and I do seek your forgiveness and reconcilation because you are my dear friend. I could have simply ignored you, told you to bugger off and got angry and hated you. I didn't for the better part of a year I have let you know, your Church know, your family know that I truly do care for you and Jonathan and how deeply you hurt me. In a couple of moments last September you negated all that was good about the friendship and love we had shared and instead of being kind and compassionate you were very cruel to me. I love you enough and always have that I never let my personal emotions make me do anything too drastic. I never put up more than two pictures because I meant this to be a tribute to my love of you and Jonathan. I never seeked to harm you by using the youtube videos you sent me and were downloaded on my hard drive. I sent letters to your Church with a story about how I was treated by you and how much I loved you because I don't want you to continue the path of treating people cruel and using God's message to put others down. I love you with all my heart Rachel Myatt and if you can't see that I am not going to walk away from you then you are not seeing God's blessing in us being put in each others life. I take full responsibility for anything I have written or done as I have not done it to hurt you at all. If you want to sue me or what ever I will accept the consequences. The day you abandoned me and said all those awful things about me I have been dead inside every since so there is nothing that hurts anymore I barely feel pain. I always hoped one day you would come back and your family would realize that someone truly loves Rachel Myatt. My campaign is going to keep going. I care for you very much. When the songs finally come out and my full story maybe then that will be what it takes for you to see just how much I love you and that you played with me like a joke and I was serious and cared about you the whole time. It will take seeing others hearing and knowing what I know for you to realize how cruel you were and through it all I still love you unconditionally.
Dear Rachel as you enter the thanksgiving season in Canada think about how much I love you and have believed in you. Are you really living a charitable loving life when you deny someone who did nothing but believe in you and love you forgiveness. Is being cruel to people and hurting them the legacy you want to leave and to teach your son. I think and believe you are better than that.I am sorry for whatever reason you were ashamed of me and couldn't be patient and kind with me through my grief of my mother. I was patient and loved you unconditionally but I guess my love and time never mattered to you.
One last thought - When you abandoned me I felt like I didn't exist to you anymore. You made me feel invisible and that all my love was for nothing so I dedicate this song to you today. "When You Don't See Me" by the Sisters of Mercy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwOcyxZIUL0&feature=related
Until I met you I had pretty much given up on falling in love and wanting a family. I wanted to start this blog off with a song by Oleander. "I Walk Alone" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDoiZc25t-k&ob=av2e Rachel you were my best friend and the when I met you I felt I didn't have to walk this earth alone anymore. God always walks with us but we are human beings and we desire attention, companionship, and most of all love. I didn't want to give my love to anyone I only wanted to give it to the best. I still believe in you. I hope that if you read this that you share this with your family. If anyone made you feel like you shouldn't be with me I hope they really take a look at this and realize how much I love you. If you are having second thoughts about me and thinking if it would be worthwhile to pick up the phone and talk to me or even a text I am ready. I still have the same number. Your name and your text are still in my phone and if you have a new number all you have to do is text me "I AM READY" and we can start the healing process. I will know it is you and it would probably bring the biggest smile to my face in a year. When my mom died I was still happy Rachel because I had you and Jonathan to love. I think one reason she held on so long is that she wanted to see me happy. She loved you even though she never got to know you and she saw the glow I had when I talked about you and Jonathan. Rachel you and Jonathan were my world and what I wanted to live for. I wanted to live a life walking with Christ with you two. Have you ever noticed that this whole time I always say how much I love you and your son? It is true. That was one thing that hurt me the most is that I truly think your kid is special and I really wanted to help raise him with you. When I gave him a hug the day I left and he asked me to send him some more Legos all I wanted to do is keep my promise. I was going to send both Jonathan and Riley a big Lego house each. I love kids and I wanted to love your family. I hope that your family knows that too. I haven't given up on you because I truly love you Rachel Myatt. It was always about your friendship to me and mine to you. I didn't want you because of your looks, I didn't care what you did for a living, I didn't want you to sleep with you. Rachel I loved you and was and am in love with you. You were all I desired and you were the one that set my heart and soul on fire. I wanted to give you all of me. I am sorry that my mom died at such an inopportune time but she wanted me to go on living and loving. If I truly had of felt it wasn't best to come see you at the time I wouldn't but I gave myself three weeks. Each day is precious to me. When my mother died I only took 1 day off of work the day after she died and went right back. My father and brother took a couple weeks off. I can't sit around when there are people to love, help, and things to do. My mother wouldn't want it that way. One thing she did want is for me to love you and believe in you. I did and I still do. I don't know what else I can say to convince you to come back to my heart sister. All I know is that I love you and if you haven't seen through all of this that I love you unconditionally. After all that was done and said I still want to have you as my best friend. I would still take you back as a girlfriend. I love you and Jonathan with all my heart and if you cant see how pure and true my love is and has always been for you its your loss. Im going to keep writing, keep praying, and keep putting my faith in God. He has never let me down and answered all my prayers. He answered my prayer the day I met you because I had the most beautiful, kind, loving person place in my life and I still believe she is there and I still care for you very much. He never said it would be easy but I put my trust in Him that you will recieve me into your life again and that your family will accept me and know that what I have done and I have been doing is only because I love you from the deepest regions of my heart, without shame, hesitation, and unwaivering. I love you and Jonathan as my own flesh and if you are still scared of that kind of love then you don't have to be. Rachel I want to be with you again. I wanted to be the humble servant of you and Jonathan and spend the rest of my days with my best friend and her loved ones . That was the sacrifice I wanted to make and become closer to the Lord in doing so. I miss you and I wish you and your family the Myatts and Friesens nothing but blessings today. Most of all Bless you and Jonathan I love you, I need you both, I care for you.
Love B,
James 4:6
But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble and oppressed.”
1 Peter 3:8[ Suffering for Doing Good ] Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.
Rachel think about how much more courage it takes to admit your wrong doing and apologize to the people you love then it does to ignore them and let problems build up. I apologized to you and I have been truly sorry for hurting you. I am repentant in the Lord and I do seek your forgiveness and reconcilation because you are my dear friend. I could have simply ignored you, told you to bugger off and got angry and hated you. I didn't for the better part of a year I have let you know, your Church know, your family know that I truly do care for you and Jonathan and how deeply you hurt me. In a couple of moments last September you negated all that was good about the friendship and love we had shared and instead of being kind and compassionate you were very cruel to me. I love you enough and always have that I never let my personal emotions make me do anything too drastic. I never put up more than two pictures because I meant this to be a tribute to my love of you and Jonathan. I never seeked to harm you by using the youtube videos you sent me and were downloaded on my hard drive. I sent letters to your Church with a story about how I was treated by you and how much I loved you because I don't want you to continue the path of treating people cruel and using God's message to put others down. I love you with all my heart Rachel Myatt and if you can't see that I am not going to walk away from you then you are not seeing God's blessing in us being put in each others life. I take full responsibility for anything I have written or done as I have not done it to hurt you at all. If you want to sue me or what ever I will accept the consequences. The day you abandoned me and said all those awful things about me I have been dead inside every since so there is nothing that hurts anymore I barely feel pain. I always hoped one day you would come back and your family would realize that someone truly loves Rachel Myatt. My campaign is going to keep going. I care for you very much. When the songs finally come out and my full story maybe then that will be what it takes for you to see just how much I love you and that you played with me like a joke and I was serious and cared about you the whole time. It will take seeing others hearing and knowing what I know for you to realize how cruel you were and through it all I still love you unconditionally.
Dear Rachel as you enter the thanksgiving season in Canada think about how much I love you and have believed in you. Are you really living a charitable loving life when you deny someone who did nothing but believe in you and love you forgiveness. Is being cruel to people and hurting them the legacy you want to leave and to teach your son. I think and believe you are better than that.I am sorry for whatever reason you were ashamed of me and couldn't be patient and kind with me through my grief of my mother. I was patient and loved you unconditionally but I guess my love and time never mattered to you.
One last thought - When you abandoned me I felt like I didn't exist to you anymore. You made me feel invisible and that all my love was for nothing so I dedicate this song to you today. "When You Don't See Me" by the Sisters of Mercy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xwOcyxZIUL0&feature=related
No comments:
Post a Comment