Songs About Rachel : 1st song of the real album - Lyrics

Holding Dark Scars on Your Heart

Do you really want to play the victim again?
Grab a match and set the world on fire instead
Stop blaming others for your failures
Accept what you cant change and become inspired my friend
Don’t let others hold you back from what you know could be great
Its never too late to fulfill your dreams and let go of the dead weight
The world is your oyster, its your playing field, it is yours for the taking
Stop sleeping, stuck in a moment, lying down in defeat you now are awakened.

You have a new beginning you could start
Stop Holding Dark Scars on Your Heart
Let the past be your guide to a future that can open you up inside
Become the one you were always supposed to be
All you have to do is believe
I know right now it seems real hard
Let go of pain and you will go far

So the one you thought was forever doesn’t love you
It wont be the first or the last
Don’t waste your time with it just let it pass
In time you’ll see that life is full of gifts
If you just have faith in it
When you thought you needed someone or something
Be firm and in the end you are all you need
Strong enough to bend and deep enough to bleed
Wounds may heal in time but you never have to be broken down and blind

You have a new beginning you could start
Stop Holding Dark Scars on Your Heart
Let the past be your guide to a future that can open you up inside
Become the one you were always supposed to be
All you have to do is believe
I know right now it seems real hard
Let go of pain and you will go far

(Bridge)
Sometimes the finish line looks so far
We get tired worn out and want to give up
When reach out destination the reward is success
Don’t cheat yourself of self preservation, love, and happiness…………… Be Blessed

You’ve broken through chains
Walked through fire and got burned
In the end you are a soldier many lessons you have learned
Ready for a warfare no one is really ever prepared for.
Now you see the purpose of life
Light triumphs over Darkness and you shine forever bright.

You have a new beginning you could start

Stop Holding Dark Scars on Your Heart

Let the past be your guide to a future that can open you up inside

Become the one you were always supposed to be

All you have to do is believe

I know right now it seems real hard

Let go of pain and you will go far


You have the chance to make amends
Be the one that forgives and forgets
Let it fuel you but still go on
Your destiny is a candle

When you reach your journey’s end
You will learn to love and trust again
If you remember this little part
Stop Holding the Dark Scars on Your Heart…..

(c)2014 Belligerent Hate Music

Sorry Im Not Sorry

Rachel Myatt,

One day when I am standing on a stage accepting an award for the story and the music I am about to release to the world you will get it.  It was all because you were truly loved and you and your family were just too blind to see the pure love in my heart I had for you and Jonathan.  All you have to do is email or write a letter and I would take this blog down, I would stop my campaign, you insist on making yourself a public spectacle still and embarrassing the New Church.  You know what.  Sorry Im not sorry and I dont care what happens to you when I tell the truth.  At least I have honor and people can trust me.  You cant even choose a man who wouldnt lie to you about loving you.  Oh thats right you had a baby with a guy who knocked up two other girls at the same time.  That is why I am sort of glad you didnt give me the time of day now. I never claim to be better than you but you and your family did that to me. I dont turn my back on my word.  I dont backstroke on everything just because of some religious dogma that says I can.  Also I always meant it when I said I loved you and while millions of people know your name and you try to slip into obscurity.  Remember I reached out to you for 4 years and you never once answered.

Sleater Kinney : The Greatest Female Rock Band Reunite!!! Why Can't Rachel Step Up and Reunite with me?

So here we are my friends.  Sleater Kinney. Besides my mom these are the woman who taught me to love, respect, and truly see the worth of a woman.  The greatest female rock band ever and one of the greatest rock bands of all time.  They reunited today to a hailstorm of press and good will. Even better is the lady behind the mask in the video is another one of my heroines.  Miranda July.  If you check this blog you will know she is the star and director of my favorite movie "You and Me and Everyone We Know" a great performance artist and someone for people to look up too.  Anyways my point here is that sometime in the next 6 months I will be releasing songs from "Songs about Rachel" with this news about Sleater Kinney they gave me even more strength to follow my dreams.  I want the whole world to know.  Also I want to be free of the hurt, the burden, and any pain Rachel inflicted on me and my family so I am just going to let it go.  


If you kept up with my blog at all know that I am passionate about the people who shaped my life and through great music and the feminist movement.  Corin Tucker, Carrie Brownstien, and Janet Weiss collectively known as Sleater Kinney had a profound effect on my life.  Rachel Myatt so did you.  I call you out today Rachel to make peace with me and to love me again like I love you.  You were my best friend and much like the music friends can make, love is the best music of all.......  http://www.billboard.com/articles/news/6289151/sleater-kinney-album-reunion-tour

To The Girl Who Was Too Blinded By Family, Societal Norms, and Religious Bigotry to Realize She Was Truly Loved

Rachel Myatt was loved and adored by me as was her son Jonathan.  She chose to let New Church Bigotry, Comments by her family, and just being a coward in general stop her from truly being loved.  She in turn was cruel, hateful, and evil after saying she loved me and wanted to be with me.  I take full responsibility for every thing I say and will say.  If she truly were a Christian she would reach out and bury the hatchet with me but she wont because if you look at a lot of the New Church peoples views on forgiveness they are selfish, half hearted attempts and they are just preaching to the choir but not living by the same standards.

This is the reason New Church People cant evolve this is the most ludicrous douchebag view of forgiveness I have ever seen I laughed and thought no wonder Rachel cant forgive. Shit like this is being shoved down her throat and being conditioned into the hearts of people like they are somewhat above forgiveness. http://www.newchurch.org/connection/issues/issues/exploring-jesus-as-god/new-perspectives-video.html  Hey she doesnt owe me anything though. Its like the subject in this video skirts around the fact of forgiveness, nor barely acknowledges it could come to fruition. Anyways just another way to expose the falsities and fake smiles in the Church of the New Jerusalem.  Rachel you were loved but you threw it all away for societal stereotypes and social norms.  You know what I say your loss and what ever rock you are hiding under you are about to have to come out. Here is one last video for you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFEmTsfFL5A

You will always let your family and your religion rule you instead of you letting God take a hold of your life and truly set you free.  You are a coward who hides behind them because you cant stand up and be yourself.  At least I say what is on my mind. At least I have to guts to fail even if miserably and then fight another day. You were only worried about parents not letting you babysit their kids because you had a black boyfriend, you were let your mom put shit in your head about mental conditions when she had no idea what I was going through morning my mother and dealing with my father. Most of all you lied to me when you said you would be there to me.  You broke your promise.  So that is what you will have to deal with the rest of your life and you will never be free. I live everyday free and just laugh at the fact that you missed out and when you finally think you are happy and you are destroyed you will remember me you piece of shit.