Rachel, I was a true friend to you and loved you beyond compare. Many guys get infatuated or obsessed with women and I am too old for that. I loved being your friend and your boyfriend but I wanted to be your boyfriend because of the friendship we had. I trusted you, I adored you, I liked who you were as a person. It seemed you never gave me the same credit. I have been trying for months to try to make peace with you because I do love you. So from here on out I wont apologize or even let you know what I am doing. You will just see things happen. In your city, In your world, on the internet. I love you and all I wanted was for us to make peace. I have made peace with so many people who I have had problems with but it means more to make peace with you then all of them. It seems that you cannot open your heart to forgive and forget and I am truly saddened by that. You had the potential to be so much more if you let go of some of the anger you had especially towards men. A man comes along and is willing to love you no matter the distance, boundaries, or obstacles and you still treat him like he doesn't exist. You talked about your baby's daddy more than any woman I know. He didn't want you he has two other kids and you were a quick lay that turned into something more come on get over it. You have a blessing with Jonathan and it will always be something you will share but move on. I was willing to give all of myself to both of you and you didn't appreciate my love, time, or devotion to you. I am doing lots of things in my life everyday and soon you will see the fruition of what I am doing. Family, Friends, and concerned parties who were there when you abandoned me will be involved. You just don't know how many people care about me and I didn't until you dumped me. I will do my mom justice in her absence and just keep loving you. Pretty soon your congregation and all family and all those around you will see exactly what kind of person you are and you will have to answer for it. I am just going to put it out there and I have no qualms, no regrets, and no cares anymore. You know why because you don't and never did care about me it seems. I am strong, I am a fighter, a loyal friend, and a person who never backs down from the people I love. I love you Rachel Myatt. If I didn't I would have told you to bugger off and told you where you could go and what to kiss but when God has a hand in things He wants us to love. So you continue living your life care free and soon you will get a rude awaking. I will never threaten you or wish harm to you intentionally but when the writing is on the wall soon I did everything I could to try to get you to make peace with me without going outside the boundaries of you and me and now it had to go outside that. You have my number it hasn't changed and you have my email neither one of those have changed. Use this chance to turn this around or you can just see what happens next and be upset when it happens that way because I warned you. I love you Rachel Myatt its your loss.
This song is for you Rachel. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtn_DD28HMo People keep telling me I should hate you and be cruel and try to get revenge but God is not about that. God is about forgiveness, redemption, and love so I will keep it up. I love you that much.
Rachel this is how high my love for you makes me. The guitar solo by Nels Cline on this video at the 2:46 mark pretty much is how much I love you. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxDJTWee-zY&feature=related Its beautiful like you. It exhilarates me. It brings me hope and the only one I love more than you is God.
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