To The Myatt Family.

I wanted just to write a quick blog and a quick message to you all.
I will never give into hate or not offer my forgiveness and I will continue to love Rachel and others who abandon me, ridicule me, or forsake my love and friendship. I could have just let go and gave up. I could have turned to drugs and alcohol to relieve the pain. I chose to heal my pain and become stronger through prayer, exercise, helping others, and music.  I am a fighter and that is what Rachel did not understand.  I get knocked down and God lifts me up even higher. He has given me the will to do what I am doing and the love. I wont turn my back on Rachel like she did to me. My heart resides with God.

Rachel Myatt I love you with all my heart and we had one of the closest deepest friendships I have ever had in my whole life.  I don't know why you chose to run like you did and I don't know why you did it at such a time when I needed you. I never ask for much and hardly ever need anyone but God but I needed you.  I love you more than words can say and I would have always been there for you and Jonathan.  I am not doing any of this to hurt you but I am doing this because you hurt me greatly and just abandoned me.  I would do anything if we could put this all behind us and be in each others life again.

Jonathan Myatt.  I wanted so bad to be your stepdad and I wanted to spend my days loving you and your mother.  I wanted to play Legos, read to you, help you with your homework, take you to whatever sport or be there to support you in any interest that you had.  I wanted to dream and be there with you.  I am sorry that your mother didn't and doesn't know how much I love her. I will always love you and for the time you were in my life it was amazing.


Jane and Howard Myatt.  I loved your daughter with everything I had.  There were times when she was very cruel and said things to upset me but I know that a true love, a Christian love will surpass that all. I have that love for her.  I still love her with all my heart and if you as parents wanted your children to be loved by someone who was truly in love with them then you didn't really know how much I loved Rachel. My idol childish threats of death and of pictures I would never take of her were stupid and they were only attempts to get back at her for her cruelty at the time. I asked for her forgiveness which she seems not to be able to give. I apologized and asked for it many times over and have made my peace with the Lord.  Jane I let you see inside of me but it was only a little bit.  It was the reserved person that had just been through a disaster and isn't quite sure if it is done yet.  That is how I felt after I lost my mother and it made me a little sad to be with the woman I love, her mother, and her son and not make me think about how much I loved my mother.  There was nothing wrong with me but grief.  I had to come to terms with alot of things especially my father who never told my mother how much he cared until she was unconcious and almost dead and that is why I told you about the relationship I had my father. He did not define me nor am I some person that harps on peoples inability to realize what a beautiful person I am.  He didn't start till I was in my 30s and he is just now beginning to see how the weird little boy who refused to be shaped into who he wanted me to be was better being himself.  Howard I will just say that I am sorry that I didn't get to know you. I would have liked to have a male figure around to do things with and have adventures with, get you down here to see Nascar and lots of other cool things that my father would never do with me.  I had nothing but respect for you and that is from the bottom of my heart and I am glad that I got to meet you. If being a husband and father was a corporation then I would want to be the CEO of loving and caring for Rachel and Jonathan. That is how much I love your daughter Howard and Jane. If I could tell you in a song how much I love Rachel still and how she made me feel it would be this song.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvbErM6ZTBA 

Amanda Myatt.  I thank you for your kindness.  For being interested in knowing about me and if I could of had you for a sister you would have been the coolest.  I wanted to get to know your children because when Rachel took me to the airport and Riley was with us I really enjoyed having him along he was super cool and when I left and Rachel and I were saying our goodbyes he even wanted to group hug.  That is what this is all about family.  I wanted you and Rachel and everybody as my family.  My friends are my family and you guys were someone I felt comfortable with that I could grow to love and be with.  I want to apologize for any inconvenience that I made for you sending you letters and things for Rachel.  I still have one gift to send you the shirt I had for you and I hope soon I will be able too.  I want you to know I love you and I wish nothing but good will for your family and your relationship.


I love you Rachel Myatt with all my heart and I put my faith in God that you will put down your arms and your family will read this and reconsider what they think about me and understand that I am a man who truly loves you and when you abruptly pushed me away after telling me you loved me and you wanted to be with me you brought more hurt and damage than you can ever imagine.  If I didn't truly love you I would have let this all go but here I have a blog, I made a record that is ready to be put out and a book just to let you know that you hurt me but I still love you with all my heart. What man would go through all that trouble if he didn't truly love and care about you with all he had.  Not many.  I hope you have a blessed day and to anyone and everyone who reads this pray that Rachel and I find our way back into each others life.  God bless


Listen to the words to these 2 songs. I love you. You are still my best friend even through all this and I wont give up or leave you.  I love you Rachel Myatt http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLo0ZCBlTas&feature=related     http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Go_Ea1o0kHQ