Dear Rachel,
First of all my freedom of expression has been restored so thank you to those who allowed that. I wanted to talk to you today about Faith dear Rachel.
Remember how you would always doubt me and I never doubted you. I always had faith in the person you were. I believed in God enough to love you for exactly who you are regardless of your short comings and flaws. Instead I chose to focus on the beauty of your imperfections, the amazing friendship you and I had, and the love you were able to give. In return all you did was doubt me and that someone could love you so much. Rachel for the past year and a month all I have done was try to show you how much you really mean to me. You did the most hurtful thing ever to me at the worst time of my life and I forgave you. I love you so much that I started a worldwide campaign to tell everybody how much I love you. I remember last year sitting back and crying and wanting to die. You were the one I wanted to have Christmas and Thanksgiving with. I wanted to share that with you because I hadn't really had that in my life. I wanted to come be with you and all the kids and share love and bond with you and your family. The day I left Dawson Creek all I wanted was to come back to you. The sadness you saw in my eyes when you took me to the airport that day was because I knew how much I was going to miss you when I left. You were the sun in my cloudy day. You were the smile on my heart. Most of all you and Jonathan were my what I was and wanted to live for. My faith in God strengthend my faith in you. I believed in all the good in you and I still do. I wish you had the love and the faith to believe in me again and realize that anyone who didnt truly love you wouldn't fight to get you back as I have. What guy would do the things I have done? It may seem a little crazy or different to you but I always fight for the people I love and I love you more than anyone else on this earth Rachel Myatt. It doesnt matter what I have to do I want you to know that. My faith in you has been shaken but God loved me so much He not only made my faith in you stronger but He brought me closer to Him. Rachel all I wanted to do was be your best friend, partner, and love in life. I still love you that much. Everyday I look at this blog and see that picture of Jonathan and you and wish I could hold you both. I wish I could be there now that its getting colder in your arms. I wish that I could just be there with you two. You caused me so much pain because I wasn't afraid to dream with you. I wanted to live out your dreams and aspirations. I wanted to travel with you and Jonathan. I wanted to worship and be one with you two as a family. I wanted to love your family. What part of that did I not show? Just because I was broken didn't mean I didn't love you. I was sad when I came but I wasn't unhappy. I still read your email about how you wanted to be there for me and how when I needed you most you abandoned me. God gives us others to be there for each other when we are up and down. I came to you because you said you loved me and wanted me. For the first time in my life I truly felt a woman wanted me for me. You were the first to make me feel like that and then that special feeling died and I just felt about you like all the other women who abused and played with my heart. You are the love of my life Rachel Myatt and I wish you could see that a man that would never give up on you and Jonathan is a man worth being with. I love you with all my heart and I will just keep trying and hope you will realize how truly special you are to me. I would lay down my life for you and Jonathan. I also will die for my faith and my love of God if called so. I just dont understand why you don't look into my heart and see the truth and the power of the love that I was given for you and see that you deserved to be loved as much as I love you. I am not here to hurt you or put you down only to love you and I love you with all I have. I dreamed of having a family someday but with you and Jonathan both my dream and my dream family had come true. I wish you knew how much I loved you. God bless you Rachel Myatt
1 Peter 4:10
Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.
1 Peter 4:19
So then, those who suffer according to God’s will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.
First of all my freedom of expression has been restored so thank you to those who allowed that. I wanted to talk to you today about Faith dear Rachel.
Remember how you would always doubt me and I never doubted you. I always had faith in the person you were. I believed in God enough to love you for exactly who you are regardless of your short comings and flaws. Instead I chose to focus on the beauty of your imperfections, the amazing friendship you and I had, and the love you were able to give. In return all you did was doubt me and that someone could love you so much. Rachel for the past year and a month all I have done was try to show you how much you really mean to me. You did the most hurtful thing ever to me at the worst time of my life and I forgave you. I love you so much that I started a worldwide campaign to tell everybody how much I love you. I remember last year sitting back and crying and wanting to die. You were the one I wanted to have Christmas and Thanksgiving with. I wanted to share that with you because I hadn't really had that in my life. I wanted to come be with you and all the kids and share love and bond with you and your family. The day I left Dawson Creek all I wanted was to come back to you. The sadness you saw in my eyes when you took me to the airport that day was because I knew how much I was going to miss you when I left. You were the sun in my cloudy day. You were the smile on my heart. Most of all you and Jonathan were my what I was and wanted to live for. My faith in God strengthend my faith in you. I believed in all the good in you and I still do. I wish you had the love and the faith to believe in me again and realize that anyone who didnt truly love you wouldn't fight to get you back as I have. What guy would do the things I have done? It may seem a little crazy or different to you but I always fight for the people I love and I love you more than anyone else on this earth Rachel Myatt. It doesnt matter what I have to do I want you to know that. My faith in you has been shaken but God loved me so much He not only made my faith in you stronger but He brought me closer to Him. Rachel all I wanted to do was be your best friend, partner, and love in life. I still love you that much. Everyday I look at this blog and see that picture of Jonathan and you and wish I could hold you both. I wish I could be there now that its getting colder in your arms. I wish that I could just be there with you two. You caused me so much pain because I wasn't afraid to dream with you. I wanted to live out your dreams and aspirations. I wanted to travel with you and Jonathan. I wanted to worship and be one with you two as a family. I wanted to love your family. What part of that did I not show? Just because I was broken didn't mean I didn't love you. I was sad when I came but I wasn't unhappy. I still read your email about how you wanted to be there for me and how when I needed you most you abandoned me. God gives us others to be there for each other when we are up and down. I came to you because you said you loved me and wanted me. For the first time in my life I truly felt a woman wanted me for me. You were the first to make me feel like that and then that special feeling died and I just felt about you like all the other women who abused and played with my heart. You are the love of my life Rachel Myatt and I wish you could see that a man that would never give up on you and Jonathan is a man worth being with. I love you with all my heart and I will just keep trying and hope you will realize how truly special you are to me. I would lay down my life for you and Jonathan. I also will die for my faith and my love of God if called so. I just dont understand why you don't look into my heart and see the truth and the power of the love that I was given for you and see that you deserved to be loved as much as I love you. I am not here to hurt you or put you down only to love you and I love you with all I have. I dreamed of having a family someday but with you and Jonathan both my dream and my dream family had come true. I wish you knew how much I loved you. God bless you Rachel Myatt
1 Peter 4:10
Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.
1 Peter 4:19
So then, those who suffer according to God’s will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.
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