Dear Rachel and Readers,
I am a humble man. I do not ask for much. All I ever wanted to do was be loved. I will not play the victim in this anymore because I transcended past that the day I start writing this blog, writing songs, and telling my story worldwide. What I am attempting to do is to let Rachel know how precious human relationships are and that if you kick someone when they are down and they are strong enough they will heal and be 10 times more powerful. Rachel thought she could just pretend she wanted to be with me, dump me, and then as she said to me "Care without a Care" I am not anyones throwaway or doormat so she lie in the bed with me literally and now a year later the whole thing is truly coming to fruition. I am someone who does not take lightly to a person who hurts me on the level that Rachel did. Lying, belittling, and making fun of a person who was in as state of grief and on top of it using the Lord's name in vain to curse me and put me down. Man the woman I thought was a good Christian woman was horrible! I have my flaws. I even use profanity once in awhile when I am really angry. Does it make me less of a Christian? No but I am willing to admit my flaws and my imperfections. Rachel was not able to look into the mirror and she how cruel and wrong she was actually treating me so when I retalliated she couldn't take it. So now she hides more so than last year. It was funny watching a person be so scared of the mess they created when all they had to do was call me up and talk to me and the whole thing would be over. We as human beings spend our lives either facing our fears and overcoming them or we can hide and be afraid and not live the best quality of life that God wants us to. Regardless of what Rachel thinks I am happy. I am doing what is in my heart and I do truly love her and if writing a book and telling my story on the internet and making videos about her treatment and from members of the New Church is what it takes for her to change her life and pespective then so be it. It takes one person to show another person the error of their ways. The other guys she pulled the stunt with may have been angry with her and just walk away but she did something a little worst to me, she played with my emotions on a grand scale and wasnt woman enough to talk to me. I love Rachel as my best friend and I pray that she comes back. I can't make her all I can do is reach out to her through video, prayer, song, and a heart that truly loves her. I believe in her and that she can transcend all that she has done and be a better woman and also make peace with me. So Rachel if you are listening know this. I have never done this to hurt you but let you know how deeply you have hurt me. If you have felt harrassed then I am sorry it is my right to express how I feel. I never changed the picture or put up too many because it was supposed to be a tribute to how much I love you and Jonathan not an angry rant. If you want to sue me or take legal action against me for telling you I love you and want to make peace with you go ahead , you have already damaged me enough what would be one more kick in the teeth. I have filed copies of the letters I sent both the Church and you and I have all our emails and correspondence where I would be able to show people about our relationship. I have done all I have done because I truly love you and never just to come out and hurt you. I will continue to love you from a far and believe in you even if you never believed in me.
Rachel For Christmas I ask that you forgive me and know that I forgive you and that you reach out to me and that we love, care, and talk again. No more no less. Be the strong woman I know that is inside you and denounce evil, let go of the pain, and show the beautiful woman that I fell in love with. There are so many great and special qualities in you and if I didn't truly love and believe in you and Jonathan I would have let it die a long time ago but this passion is true in my heart and it always will be. It is your choice what pages I turn in this book and how this story ends. I love you. I have love and respect for your whole family and I want them to know that I have never meant to disrespect or hurt any of them. Rachel you hurt me and my family and the saddest thing of all you were my family because I hold my best friends as close as blood my extended brothers and sisters. I really love you and you are just to stubborn to see or accept that.
If you havent yet checked this out this is my simple start of the series of love letters I am going to send Rachel via the internet
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IM4TuI4mO6g&feature=channel_video_title
God Bless All
I am a humble man. I do not ask for much. All I ever wanted to do was be loved. I will not play the victim in this anymore because I transcended past that the day I start writing this blog, writing songs, and telling my story worldwide. What I am attempting to do is to let Rachel know how precious human relationships are and that if you kick someone when they are down and they are strong enough they will heal and be 10 times more powerful. Rachel thought she could just pretend she wanted to be with me, dump me, and then as she said to me "Care without a Care" I am not anyones throwaway or doormat so she lie in the bed with me literally and now a year later the whole thing is truly coming to fruition. I am someone who does not take lightly to a person who hurts me on the level that Rachel did. Lying, belittling, and making fun of a person who was in as state of grief and on top of it using the Lord's name in vain to curse me and put me down. Man the woman I thought was a good Christian woman was horrible! I have my flaws. I even use profanity once in awhile when I am really angry. Does it make me less of a Christian? No but I am willing to admit my flaws and my imperfections. Rachel was not able to look into the mirror and she how cruel and wrong she was actually treating me so when I retalliated she couldn't take it. So now she hides more so than last year. It was funny watching a person be so scared of the mess they created when all they had to do was call me up and talk to me and the whole thing would be over. We as human beings spend our lives either facing our fears and overcoming them or we can hide and be afraid and not live the best quality of life that God wants us to. Regardless of what Rachel thinks I am happy. I am doing what is in my heart and I do truly love her and if writing a book and telling my story on the internet and making videos about her treatment and from members of the New Church is what it takes for her to change her life and pespective then so be it. It takes one person to show another person the error of their ways. The other guys she pulled the stunt with may have been angry with her and just walk away but she did something a little worst to me, she played with my emotions on a grand scale and wasnt woman enough to talk to me. I love Rachel as my best friend and I pray that she comes back. I can't make her all I can do is reach out to her through video, prayer, song, and a heart that truly loves her. I believe in her and that she can transcend all that she has done and be a better woman and also make peace with me. So Rachel if you are listening know this. I have never done this to hurt you but let you know how deeply you have hurt me. If you have felt harrassed then I am sorry it is my right to express how I feel. I never changed the picture or put up too many because it was supposed to be a tribute to how much I love you and Jonathan not an angry rant. If you want to sue me or take legal action against me for telling you I love you and want to make peace with you go ahead , you have already damaged me enough what would be one more kick in the teeth. I have filed copies of the letters I sent both the Church and you and I have all our emails and correspondence where I would be able to show people about our relationship. I have done all I have done because I truly love you and never just to come out and hurt you. I will continue to love you from a far and believe in you even if you never believed in me.
Rachel For Christmas I ask that you forgive me and know that I forgive you and that you reach out to me and that we love, care, and talk again. No more no less. Be the strong woman I know that is inside you and denounce evil, let go of the pain, and show the beautiful woman that I fell in love with. There are so many great and special qualities in you and if I didn't truly love and believe in you and Jonathan I would have let it die a long time ago but this passion is true in my heart and it always will be. It is your choice what pages I turn in this book and how this story ends. I love you. I have love and respect for your whole family and I want them to know that I have never meant to disrespect or hurt any of them. Rachel you hurt me and my family and the saddest thing of all you were my family because I hold my best friends as close as blood my extended brothers and sisters. I really love you and you are just to stubborn to see or accept that.
If you havent yet checked this out this is my simple start of the series of love letters I am going to send Rachel via the internet
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IM4TuI4mO6g&feature=channel_video_title
God Bless All
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