Rachel and Jonathan

Rachel and Jonathan
I Love you and Always Will

Sunday, August 28, 2011

The Pretender

I was in your bed you held me in your arms kissed you on your naked body and you shared with me your charms
You told me that you loved me and wanted me.  I believed you then you suddenly abandoned me
I was lost and cold left in the wind. The nights were so painful that I will never love again
And the worst part about the whole situation is that I was your friend and you didn't appreciate it

To me it was all about love and honor, respect, morals and family or did you want that.
I wasn't an experiment I was a human heart, a real person but I was your game and you played the part.
So selfish not knowing what I was going through. Even though you hurt me I don't wish evil on you.
I hope one day you look back and understand the damage you did and why you received the payback.
I'm not out for retalliation, vengence, or revenge.  I have a story to tell on the truth I will extend

You chose to lie to a heart so true.  A man that would have moved space and time for you.
I loved you and your son.  You chose to treat me like a ragdoll and move on.
To me true love is what mattered, but you made up all these excuses and my heart you shattered
Other people have feelings too! We are not at the disposal of amusing you
I won't forget one cruel word, or how I cried, almost died, and saw death in your hateful slurs
I hope the same is returned to you. One day when you think you are in love he just crushes you.
I hope that you burn the way you put me in flames. When your mom dies maybe you will remember my name.
How you ridiculed and taunted me.  When all I wanted was you to love me. I look back at all your letters and lies and I feel the betrayal, the heartbreak, and the demise.
I don't care if you hurt now. I'm just here to tell a story and get the word out. Go ahead take down all your pictures and videos off the internet because the truth is what I have to say hasn't hit yet.
I am like an open book. I am not ashamed of saying anything private that I may have overlooked
You never appreciated the relationship, to you I was just someone to pass time in your lonely ship.
Now you look at the clock almost a year is past. I still hurt and love you and the hands past 5 but I wont revisit the hour that you tore me apart instead on mission I have decided to embark.  I want you to understand now I am a broken man. You destroyed my believe in the hope of a good woman. So go ahead and pretend that you are a good Christian woman. While you judge others and show inconsideration and are not compassionate. When all the walls come falling down around you know that I no longer care and won't help you rebound.  You left me out in the middle of the street like a homeless child with no parents and nothing to eat.  I would have never been that cruel to you now hindsight and recollection is that I was truly in lN LOVE WITH YOU
, but you were just another wolf taking a piece of my heart then walking off into the woods.  No integrity, just take what you need and discard.  When the truth comes out for you it will be hard.  I hope you have nightmares about me because I am your worst one because when I am done you wont forget me.  All over your dreams because of what you did. No security blanket or doll like when you were a little kid.  You will have to face the facts that we are responsible for our good deeds and our evil acts.  In your case you live a life with no remorse I would rather live a life of forgiveness and no regrets.  My love for you was never a mistake it was true it was real and I cared about you and I can truly say.  That I would have given you all of me but you treated me like a joke and so now you will see. What you did has consequences. You are past the point of no return you burned the bridges now theres no mending fences.  I am sorry that felt you were justified to make such remarks because my mother had just died.  I would never wish that pain on you but the things that you did you have no clue. So just hide, go ahead and walk away.  Soon you will get the jest of all that I have left to say. You are just a scared and inconsiderate woman. If you were truly strong you would face up to all that you have done. Your hide behind others to justify your lies and wrongs but eventually it will catch up to you like the end of the song.  So I don't have many thoughts left to expound on this except I remember when you and I first kissed. I thought my lips would be filled with love and joy but you will now see how your lies and hurt have turned that to something more.  In my sadness came a strength I could not subdue. God put in my heart to just keep loving you.  If you want to ignore me go ahead because I wont turn my back on anything that Christ has said. You can continue being my enemy. That is ok because you will never be that to me. I love you Rachel Myatt go ahead and keep quiet because at the end of the day I won't live my life in silence. I am here to be seen and heard living life to the fullest and being one with HIS Word.  You can't forgive, forget, and move on well that is ok hold that darkness in your heart I wont be there when sunlight hits the dawn. Then you wake up and realize what you done and its all out in the open and you are standing there open mouth, hanging tongue. From tragedy I rose from the ashes like a phoenix from the flame my story will reach masses. Then you will finally see the light but it will be to late because I will have already taken flight.  I was your friend, forever! No returning letters to the sender but you betrayed all that was sacred, beautiful, loving, and tender. I am sorry that I took the time to love you Rachel Myatt the Pretender  

For being so hurtful with your words making fun of a grieving person and calling them sick, messed up, and damaged.  I wish you no harm,  I haven't stopped caring about you but I dedicated this video to you today to show you how hateful I could be but I still choose to be full of love for you.  Instead though I felt like this at first and you deserve it if I still did.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmKHHdqwVes

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