Dear Readers,
When Rachel abandoned me the first song was one of the songs that helped me live and keep loving her. The second one is how much I loved her and how I thought the world of her and her son. I just wanted to write this blog for her today and let her know a few things
Rachel Myatt you were my best friend and the love of my life and I will never open my heart to anyone again because you were so cruel to the true love I had for you.
I dreamed with you and wanted nothing but to be with you and Jonathan and you played with that dream. I wasn't a game or some experiment. Worst of all you mocked my love for you on the internet and you doubted my love of God.
I loved you and your family and nothing I have ever done has been done or said on this blog or any of my essays to ever disrespect that love. In return I also do not hold back my feelings and I am direct and precise and have no reason to doubt them. On June 2nd I will send a clear message to Pastor Jim Cooper, Pastor Coleman Glenn, and Rachel Myatt on where I stand and what the New Church can expect because of the actions of those people toward me and my family.
I was just a man full of love. I loved you Rachel and believed in you and Jonathan and even if you didn't want my love you could have at least been honest with me and kind. You dont know what it is to truly love anyone because all you do is hurt people and get mad at the people who do love you because of the people who wont love you. I would never do that. You wasted all that time in my life when I was serious and truly wanted and loved you. Its your loss and you now have to face the consequences. I am fine but I havent forgot your cruelty to me, toward my mother, my family or your lies, deciet, betrayal and you unwillingness to forgive and reconcile. True friends dont hold grudges and treat each other like they dont exist. I guess you never loved me and were never my true friend. If that is the case: I don't owe you or your family anymore love, respect, or kindness and I can just go off on you with full disdain and reckless abandonment. I can say hurtful things about your family, your church, and put down you as much as I want. I can do whatever I want without thinking about any consequences according to you, Pastor Glenn, and the New Church. God will make everything all right if I willingly just do evil things and know I am doing them and treat people like dirt and less than human. The world is my playground like it is yours so why can't I exhibit the same hateful, selfish, and hurtful behavior Rachel? I can do evil things because that is the school of life that you subscribe to Rachel Myatt!!!!!
Truth is I will never be anything like you. I know God's Mercy, the power of forgiveness, the sanctity of love, I dont treat people like my own personal play things. I am not afraid to tell the truth or tell people when something is wrong. Most of all I wont slander someone who is hurting or disrespect their dead relatives. Just as I did nothing but have respect for your Grandfather and wish your family well. You put me down, said I used my mother's death as a crutch and that I was crazy, unstable, and messed up because I was in grief and mourning. Really all that I was Rachel was a man who truly loved you who was trying to get on with his life after losing his mother and one who loved you and believed in you and Jonathan enough to care and keep my promises to you. So you deserve all that I am about to do and say and I no longer care about your feelings, your families feelings, or how your Church feels because you were never there for me like you said you would be and liars, betrayers, and hypocrites are the worst people.
Im done with being kind....................
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