The Day My Mother Died : 2 Years Ago - I Still Love Rachel Myatt

Dear Rachel and Readers, My mother passed away on August 8th 2010 and I will never forget that day.  It changed my life forever as did a month later on September 9th 2010 when Rachel abandoned me.  I'll never forget my mom blessing Rachel and the Myatt family and her asking me to be good to Rachel and Jonathan and always love them.  I'll never forget her giving me her blessing to leave her to go be with Rachel even though she knew I would not. My mom loved people so much and what you people in the New Church dont get is that I was taught to love uncondtionally and to be good to those who persecute and make fun of us.  This blog started out as an act of love and became an window into the hurt and betrayal Rachel bestowed on our friendship, love, and God's love for both of us.  All I will say today is that I love you Rachel and Jonathan and I know my mother would want me to keep doing that.  I am sorry if any of this blog hurts you and my campaign but I love you with all my heart both of you.   I wanted a family with you because I saw through all the barriers of what you tried to hide and I believed in you.  All the cruel things you said and did to me I forgive them but I wont forget them.  The day I do that is the day you pick up the phone and make peace with me.  I wish your mother and father lots of life and that they live another 20 or 30yrs.  My mother died at 59 with no grandchildren by either me and my brother and that was my biggest regret but she always was happy that Jonathan would have been in my life and she smiled and was happy for me because she knew I was truly in love with you.  There are tears falling down my face as I write this because I love you so much and you tried to make me out as some sick damaged person when all I was was very hurt and grieving.  So you passed judgment on me.  My father is dying right now too.  I watched him go from a strong agile 60 yr old to a frail 61yr old because of the chemotherapy he is on.  Soon it will be just me and my brother.  Soon we will be parentless and alone.  You never knew how much having you and Jonathan in my life meant to me and how it changed my life but you couldnt be patient and believe in me you were so quick to dismiss me not knowing an ounce of how I feel.  One day something will happen and you will realize how cruel you are and how much someone truly loved you.  I leave you with this blog I wrote for you about your own parents dying and for all the New Church Pastors who have wives and children who judged a single man who only wanted a family and to worship the Lord and they put me down.  http://iloverachelmyatt.blogspot.com/2011/11/what-if-your-parents-died-rachel.html for  all this Pastor such  as Pastor Lumsden and others who have a family who judged me and for Rachel and her family who have lots of children and grandchildren and lots of love you judged me for wanting the same with Rachel and put me down for believing in her.  She played with something sacred and something that meant something to me and I truly cared for her and her family.  On this day of mourning and reflection I am saddened that after 2 years Rachel still is silent.  None the less I press on because Rachel I have, still, and always love you.  I dedicate my heart to you in honor of my mother and wish you nothing but peace and good will today. God Bless ALL