Jaded, Insecure, Messed Up, Worldview(Why The New Church People are so Defensive of Their Religion)

Dear Readers, Insecure people lash out and make fun of others because they cannot deal with their own short comings and inadequacies.   I realized in the months after Rachel abandoned me that the whole time she doubted her ability to be loved so much by someone and the ability to look in the mirror and love herself. She was always talking bad about someone else whether it be her sister Amanda or the person trying to fix her printer.  She always talked down to me especially in terms of her New Church faith and as someone who truly loved her I just ignored it.  Now I am not going to ignore it and not only am I taking a shot at Rachel Myatt but a shot at the General New Church Assembly because of this value that they instill in people.  Why are the New Church people so defensive about their faith instead of loving , patient, and kind.  Here is the reason.  They feel inadequate as a relatively small cult like fringe sect of Christianity(Im taking a judgmental page from the Pastor Coleman Glenn Playbook in saying that).  They know in essence very few people will take them seriously so instead of try to practice what they preach and let people learn and decide by love a lot of them feel they have to criticize and put down others love of God and their theology.  It seems like they are the child that knows deep inside they are doing something wrong(A Lot of Swedenborgs Teachings are hypocritical and Contradictory to what is in the Bible the true Word of God) so they divert your attention away from the wrong doing and put up smoke and mirrors to make you feel guilty or bad about your beliefs.  They have never had someone take them to task or hold them up to the scale that I am about to and they think I am some simpleton that just runs his mouth on the computer but little by little they are finding out I am a force to be reckoned with because I am out doing what I say a bit at a time.  I put the song "Mascara"" by Austrailan band Killing Heidi up for two reasons.  One it is about self esteem and loving yourself and not letting what others say get to you. Even I let Rachel's cruelty get to me but I never stopped loving her or wishing for peace between us, reconciliation, or God's love.  It is a song about being judged and how we react to it. The second video is the band that formed after Killing Heidi broke up called the Verses.  The same teens who wrote Mascara wrote a beautiful song called "Want Everything". Time changes everything and if people only took the time to see that the world would be a better place.   I can sit here and talk about what Rachel did to me all day or how the New Church Pastors replied to me and scoffed at me or I can be out telling people about the New Church in day to day life and that is the most effective thing to show the New Church that internally they need a change.  I am proud that I have started this revolution against them and always remember.  I came to The Church of New Jerusalem both Dawson Creek and In General with nothing but love but both they, Rachel, The Myatt Family, and the Pastors turned a blind eye to the love I had.   You could have sought peace but you made excuses why the evil Rachel did should stand and now I understand it is so God had room to work in my heart with this wake up call for the Chuch of the New Jerusalem and that makes me feel good to know that my heart and love is cherished by God even if Rachel and her family abused and took advantage of it.