I Would Have Left Well Enough Alone If......................But You Chose Lying and Deception over love Rachel

I wanted to start my blog off today with this video because this video is the real deal.  This a woman who knows the heartfelt truth about lying.   She knows the consequences it has and pain it can cause.  This blog is about causing others pain and not being responsible for our actions or thinking they have consequences. Want me to go away confront me! Apologize, Reconcile. Do the right thing!!!!

• Dear Readers,

1.

In the past year and a half I have stood by this blog religiously.  I also stand by the things I say on here even when they are harsh and hurtful. I want to point out why this blog is still going.  Rachel lied, she slandered me, and she hurt my family by her actions.  Rachel's family was probably part of it to but the responsibility falls solely on Rachel Myatt.  I loved Rachel and her son Jonathan like they were my own body.  I wanted Jonathan to be my son just as much as he were my own flesh because I loved his mother so.  She made horrible accusations about me being sick and mentally ill, she said ill things toward my dead mother, and most of all she said that she would deny that we were ever together and if I said anything no one would believe me.  She even told me if I had gotten her pregnant she would never let me see the baby or never even let me know I had a kid and this was before I was with her.  What kind of person is that cruel and evil and yet someone loved her unconditionally, her child, wanted to love her and her family also but she would be so unkind, unloving, and uncaring to me.  I want to speak on a few things that were addressed in the video above.

• 1. Ruining Peoples Lives. Rachel never thought about how many lives her lies would ruin or touch.  She not only hurt and ruined my love, my perception of women, but she made fun of my love of God when I never did anything but study and try to understand her.  She is very selfish and I say that because its true. She only thinks of herself.  If she truly cared she would have come to me a year ago and said Brother I am sorry for treating you like you did can we make peace.  She doesn't care how it affects Jonathan, her family, her siblings, her church and most of all herself.  She sure didnt care about how what she said and did affected me and my family.  I don't seek revenge or vengeance because that is wrong and I have had to fight that but God is showing not only Rachel and her family but the Church of the New Jerusalem a lesson in humility and that was and is how this blog came to be and still is.  God inspired me to do this as a means to not only cope with the hurt and the evil Rachel bestowed on me but to help me grow in strength not to hate others and give up on the great love He gave me but to grow with more love in my heart. 

 

•    2.  Religious Bigotry and Pastor Coleman Glenn, I want to say this.  If I met him in real life I would probably think Coleman Glenn was cool person but it is his discernment and his judgement that I do not agree with.  I am sorry if my blog has sounded like an attack on you at anytime and it is, an attack to get you to confront the demons and fallacies within your church, within your flock.  I never said I was perfect but you missed a key opportunity to turn someone to the Lord and they had come looking to not only Rachel and the Myatt family but to you. When I was broken and hurting and then to have someone who said they loved you and were there for you to destroy you like Rachel did.  Her Pastor then comes along and makes excuses and throws rhetoric at you like your opinion and your voice dont matter.  You made it seem Coleman that only Rachel's happiness mattered not the fact that I am human too and that Rachel was the one who was at fault.  I never lied to her, I was honest, I told her everything, and I gave her a way out.   She chose to lie to me, she chose to be cruel when she didnt get her way, and she chose to tear me down. You in turn did the same thing and I as a Christian expect more from Clergy especially if I come to someone in confidence that is not of the faith I prescribe to.  Do you realize all the people who I have shared this with that now have a negative perception of the Church of the New Jerusalem.  You had a hand and that and as a Pastor you are supposed to bring people to the Church not turn them away.  If one person in your flock is sick and need to be healed then they need to be tended to and Rachel helped and is still spreading this sickness.  You say you are of Good and Truth.  You say you are of Charity. Where is Jesus ministry of Reconciliation? Why would Rachel rather this be out in the open then to address me personally? Why would she rather have you and others pulled into this? It is because she knows what she has done is wrong and she is embarrased and she is too prideful and has no humility enough to say she was wrong in anything. She even told me she teaches Jonathan not to say he is sorry or apologize.  I on the other hand. I will admit to some of the harsh things I said and I am sorry to both you, her, and the Church but that does not take either you, Rachel, or the Church away from the lens as a Christian that you have publicly been put under because of Rachel and I will continue to expouse those truths.  I want to point on some of your religious bias and bigotry really quick by using one of your blogs from 2008 and this is about how you came to believe.  You mocked my love for Rachel and how God brought me to this and I used the analogy a long time ago that you can no less mock me being called by God as God called you to the laity. God did bring me to this place as a wake up call to the New Church and my work has just begun.  You have a place in it too, you can choose to make things right and reach out to me with Rachel and right wrongs,  put Jesus reconciliation first, and forgiveness be had or you can sit back and pretend like I am just an armchair protester and watch as my message about how the New Church treats other Christians which is your and others Pastors words reach the masses through my grassroots efforts.  The following is from your blog "Being Honest With Myself" http://theolog.wordpress.com/2008/10/24/being-honest-with-myself/

I think everyone comes to a point where they realize that “if they were honest with themselves” – that is, if they looked at their heart – they would realize they didn’t believe in God. This doesn’t mean that everyone lets go of their intellectual faith, or their willingness to “stick with” their religion. But the fact is, faith only exists where there’s charity, and we don’t start with charity. We can have enough faith to keep following the path that will lead to real faith, but we come to a point where we realize that our faith is basically just historical.

Some people decide at this point to start being honest with themselves. And because at their heart they don’t actually believe in God, they feel like a weight has been lifted off their shoulders when they reject faith, because it was artificial – they were lying to themselves when they said they believed. And some of them assume because of this that everyone who has faith is deceiving themselves. Because that had been their experience of faith. Still, I think many people come to this state and then later do come to see God in an honest way. But others start to see this state as the only truly reasonable one and back up their positions with arguments and set themselves firmly in this state.

But other people don’t take this step, and there are those who do take this step who decide to at least be open to the idea of God . And some of these people come to a place where they keep learning, they keep trying, and then at some point or another, they see God. They have a sense of incredible awe from the order in the universe – that we live in a universe with structure and rules. Or they actually feel the unfathomable miracle that a baby can be born. Or they realize just how incredibly real love is – and they realize that the love they feel must be from something (well, Someone) much bigger than themselves. We have moments where we realize that if we are honest with ourselves, we completely believe in God. And we realize that this belief, this sight, is much truer, much clearer, much more alive than our old “honesty with ourselves.” Our faith is not a construction; our faith is the rock that everything else is constructed on.

• So What Coleman? God didnt come to me to love Rachel because it wasn't with New Church Guidelines? God isnt' with me in my attempt to show Rachel that love, reconciliation, and peace is what I believe in. I am not the one who lied to people. I am not the one who tried to hide. When we do evil and try to hide from it we know we are the ones at fault. Truth be told about 4 days after Rachel said all the things she said she tried to take down a lot of the pictures and sites on the internet she had put up. It wasnt until I started this blog and a friend of mine who wrote you went on her youtube page and called her out on things that she took down that site. She knew she was being evil 6 months before I ever put up this blog.  See there are cold hard facts, there are telephone text messages, email, messenger conversations, and all sorts of things I could do to destroy Rachel and any credibility she has but instead I have kept those to a very bear minimum only putting up a couple to let you see how much she said she loved me and how she then hatefully turned her back on me.  I have heard you Pastor Glenn, Pastor Lumsden, and a couple of other Pastors say that God is not with me.  See that is the problem with you thinking that God has been with me the whole time and it is people who judge others ability to see and find God who God is not truly with.  I am going to quickly touch on your Engagement to Anne,  Coleman.  Think about me being in love with Rachel as much as you are with Anne.  I built a friendship with Rachel a long distance one at that. I was faithful to her, I was loyal,  I kept my promises, she even got a promise ring, and I wanted nothing more to love her and her son.  You dont even have a child to worry about just you and Anne.  I was willing to give up my whole life here leave my family, my friends behind, and give myself to the Lord and worship with Rachel because God loved me and allowed me to see that love in Rachel no matter how much she doubted herself because she is full of insecurities and self doubt.  I have some too but not to the point where I have to put others down.  I doubt she truly believes in what the New Church has to offer because she uses it as an excuse to alienate and hurt others.  That is a form of bigotry and you are the Pastor of a Church and it reflects on not only Rachel's family upbringing but you as an administor and counseler of doctrine.  Now back to my point about you and Anne.  Rachel lied to me, said she loved me, and put herself in a situation where she wasn't truthful.  She gave me false hope when I asked her to tell me the truth and I was ready to be rejected if she didnt want to be with me.  Instead all she thought about was herself and how if she waited till I came home she didnt have to face me.  That was selfish, it was self loving, and it was unfair to me.  I was completely in love with her and Jonathan and not only was I ready to see her again she spent two days after that telling me how much she loved me.  Imagine two days after you got engaged Anne turning to you, saying she cant be with you, telling you you are damaged, messed up, and you are sad.  Imagine your mother Hilary having just died and where you thought you had support and people who loved you, you had no one.  Imagine not being close to your father and your brother though you were close to him he was away dealing with it his own way.  Imagine your mother blessing all of Anne's family on her deathbed and telling you to just go love and live your life then having Anne just crush you.  Do you know see the damage that Rachel caused to not only my family, but her family, and to the Church.  Do you realize that damage that you as a Pastor have done to me because I was at your doorstep and instead of just show love and compassion you felt the need to defend Rachel's evil actions to make yourself seem doctrinally sound? The reason I attack you on your points is because you are very hypocritical.  I deserve to be happy just like everyone else and when someone like Rachel comes along,  lies on the scale that she does, and then you just expect me to bend over and take it and go on with life.  I would have left well enough alone like I do with most rejections but what she did was worst than rejection.  She claimed to want me then take it away like an indian giver and then be cruel and evil about things and make false allegations about my mental state and character.  So here I am pointing out both her character and yours and though I have never met you,  I am going on what you write and how you respond to me and it has been self serving.
  
  
  
  I just want everyone to think about why I am doing this,  Rachel, Myatt Family, New Church this is happening because Rachel has a problem lying.  She has a problem with not expressing her true feelings, she is emeshed in the family so much and spends so much time around kids she doesn't know how to interact with adults around her that are not family or within the Church who are basically all family too.  If you do not get out of a comfort zone to grow you become prejudiced, bigoted, and never truly see the world for as big of a place as it is.  I was not Rachel's expirement I was a man and still am a man who loves Rachel and Jonathan very much and I hope that this blog today will prompt Rachel to seek reconcilation and help Pastor Glenn and other New Church clergy to realize I am not backing down and I have just begun my work.  If they want to ignore me as a little pebble that is fine because something small can grow into something great just like faith in God.