My Happiness Will Prevail - To Rachel, The Myatt Family, and Pastor Glenn

Dear Readers,
In my fathers final days on this earth he was very cruel to me.  He blamed me for his being sick, he acted like I owed him something, and cursed me out.  All I did was keep caring and being loving and accept what I knew I could never change.  When I found him dead I was hurt that he died alone that way and tears flowed down my face as I talked to the police officer.   Even the people who hurt us the most we have love for. 

To Rachel, the Myatt Family, and Pastor Coleman Glenn,

I am sorry that none of you understand what it is like to grieve nor understand what it is like to be abused your whole life.  I was mistreated by my father until almost the end and I am 37 years old.  All I ever wanted was for him to be proud of me but nothing I did was never good enough.  I put 100% of love and caring into people everyday and I do not judge people but it seems being a member of a Swedenborgian Church that is one of your main sacrements, to put others down and belittle them according to New Church standards.   One day Rachel will realize the mistake she made and that she is by never making peace with me.  By ignoring me she gave me the freedom to tell my story.  She doesn't care how it affects Jonathan or anyone else as long as she doesn't have to talk to me or deal with me.  I'm fine with that because in essence she showed her true cowardly nature by speaking and being unkind and not being able to back the things up she said.  She made promises to me that were right there for all to see and she let pride and prejudice allow her from being with someone who truly loved her.  I want to say this right now Rachel Myatt : You are the only woman I ever truly loved.  I wanted you and Jonathan to be my soulmates and my partners in this life.  I wanted to worship with you, watch both of you grow and grow with you.  I adored you, looked up to you, and my heart belonged to you. You blew it.   I am also saddened that Pastor Glenn acted as a Pastor as he did.  He shunned my love for Rachel, focused on her free will and her role in the New Church while he carried on the same kind of relationship Rachel and I had.  I courted Rachel,  I loved Rachel,  I was in love with Rachel and I gave her my heart, body, and soul.  I wanted to be one with her in the Lord.  Instead she used me, manipulated me, and then tried to make me out as some mentally ill psychopath when she was the one who didnt know what she wanted.   It was very cruel, cheap, and low and part of my happiness will be in telling others what New Church members hold high in esteem.  I will be sharing the love letters Rachel sent me and the replies Pastor Glenn left for me pertaining to how only Rachel's free will mattered.  You know if Pastor Glenn was a true servant of God he would value his job and love God not because of what financial stability or status it could bring it but because of God's love itself.  He said replying to me would could cost him his job basically and Pastor Cooper was the same.  You men are cowards and petty.  My mom was a Jehovah's Witness and you know that most of the people in the equivalent of what Pastor Glenn do in their organization dont get paid.  They do it because of their love of God.  They go from congregation from congregation, live in a trailer or as a house guest from one of the people in the congregation.  They are provided with food and shelter because the Lord loves them.  So while you were trying to defend your $55,000 a year salary and swing dance all over the world, you were scared of a man who was willing to take you and your doctrine on and being a hypocrite at the same time.  Funny thing is I never took on my moms religion but I learned a lot from good people who were considered different to others. That is why they are the fastest growing U.S. religion.  You could learn a lot from actually serving God, Pastor Glenn, Pastor Cooper, and others in the Church of the New Jerusalem if you would take the time to be servants and wash the feet of others. 

Rachel Myatt all you have to do is be courageous and pick up a pen, a phone,  or email me.  My arms are outstretched to end this with you so today I dedicate.  "With Arms Outstretched" by Rilo Kiley to you.  The ball is in your court how far your story goes because it is my story too.  It makes me happy telling it and I guess you are ok with it and it makes you happy too because you continue to hide and be silent. Or is it that I have shamed and embarrased you? Either way it is your loss.