Dear Readers,
I wanted to start this blog off with a song by the band Tilt called "Libel" there is a reason for this. First of all Cinder Morgan who is the singer has always been one of my heroines she is an entrepeneur, activist, classically trained singer, artist and an all around awesome person. If you have any concert tshirts or tshirts at all that come from Cinder Block she is the woman behind that company. When I was a teen and young 20s I listened to them religiously and this was one of the first videos they had. They were always intelligent in lyrics, insightful, and eye opening. They talked about topics from freedom, abortion, bigotry, and self realization. There were rarely any profanities in their songs and it was more about using your mind than just a punk rock look or delivery. I wanted to use this song to utilize and defend what I am about to say next.
I have always and will always love Rachel Myatt. Rachel didnt understand she was punishing me for something that was out of my control. The death of my mother. I had so much inside that I was willing to share with her. I shared things with her and her mother Jane that I had held in for awhile because I trusted them. When a loved one dies especially the one that took care of you then it is a big change in life. I put up all sorts of scenarios for Rachel like what if she died and how would Jonathan feel or what if her mother died. She didnt know how I felt and she judged me on how I was at the time and lots of other things that were neither fair, true, or kind. Some could say the same thing about what I say on this blog but I am not here to slander or hurt Rachel, Pastor Glenn, The Myatt Family, or The New Church. I am just presenting a mirror image of how they treat others and reflecting it back at them. Rachel didnt want to be responsible for any of her actions so this blog was my reaction to her saying that there were no consequences for anything she did and that she could do whatever she wanted. That is exactly what she told me. So doesnt that give me the same right to do the same. She said all those horrible things about me, put my family down, and hurt me. In the end I have told her and her family how much I love her and them, I have reached out worldwide to her, her family, and her Church. I use this blog as a conduit for my love, my hurt, my anger, and to keep me balanced because God has given me a love greater than any He has given me in this life for Rachel Myatt. She can choose to continue ignoring it or she can open her heart back up to it before it escalates even greater. No matter what I want the Myatt Family, The Church of The New Jerusalem, and Rachel Myatt and Pastor Coleman Glenn to know this. I stand by everything I said. I have copies of all the letters I sent to the Church. I have all of Rachel's correspondence with me, I have letters, pictures, emails between both Rachel, The Pastors and Concerned Parties in the New Church, and I even have the card that Rachel's mother Jane and her father Howard sent me after my mother died. That one hurts me the most because her whole family never knew how much I loved them and wanted to cherish them. My point being in this blog if anyone tries to make this out as an attempt at slander or libel then I have all the documents and necessary things I will be glad to share. I have said plenty of harsh things on here but I have said them with just cause because of how Rachel treated me. If they weren't true I wouldnt say them. Rachel knows in her heart the damage and pain she has caused and she continually tries to hide from it. It makes me sad because I love her so much and she was my best friend. I love her and Jonathan with all my being and heart but she continues to let whatever dark forces keep us apart. I put the disclaimer in my blog when first put it up a year and 3 months ago about how this was an attempt at Reconcilation, Peace, and Love. I honestly still believe in that. I put my faith in God so I am still here. If anyone thinks I am not living my life and waiting on Rachel they are wrong. I go on dates, I have beautiful lady friends, I am living a fulfilling life. I write songs, I work out, I play sports, work 6 days a week, volunteer, and most of all I live a life of giving to others through love, support, and charity. Rachel is the one person I love enough to do this blog and if she has taken it as a burden then she should take a second look. What person who didnt truly love her would take all this time to get her attention. Who would single handedly go up against a whole Church and question there beliefs, print fliers, and do the things I have done because someone used their doctrine for hurt and ill will? Who loves this person after all she did to him and is waiting with open arms for her to come back? Not many guys would love someone as Unconditionally and Unwavering as I do you Rachel Myatt. I kept my promise to God though and if you cant see that a good Christian man truly loves you and wants to make peace with you. If your family is holding you back from contacting me and cant see the love I have for you than I am saddened. I want to say this to the Myatt family as the closing to my blog.
Dear Myatt Family,
I wanted you to know how much I love Rachel and why you all hurt me so much. When I came to Dawson Creek I saw a great big family full of love. I saw children, grandchildren, and lots of people. That was all I ever wanted in my life. I never had that growing up and it was my dream to have that since I was a 12yr old child. I had hurt, lies, abuse, and rejection. Why would you not want the same for someone who needed love to be blessed with the same as you have. Someone who could have fell to the wayside to drugs, alcohol, gang life. I chose love, intelligence, and God over all those things. Do you understand why and how Rachel is hurting me dear Myatts? Do you understand Church of the New Jerusalem? Rachel tried to make me look bad, like a crazy person, a villian and mentally inept to justify the evil she was doing. She never thought how it would affect me, you her family, her Church or even little Jonathan. It was all about her. It was very selfish and one sided. I gave up a lot to be with her. I put her and Jonathan above myself even when I could have just sat back and grieved and been sad I loved them so much I just wanted to be with them. I believed in Rachel and when I met her I wanted that love with only her and Jonathan. No other woman moved me as much as she did. Maybe Rachel was unsure of being loved the way I loved her but it was true. I never wanted anyone but her and I was faithful to her. I love her and Jonathan and would give my life for her. If anyone gave Rachel cause for not being with me then I am sorry for that because you truly didnt take the time to know me. I had the weight of the world on my back with my mothers death. I had a father who for the first time in his life had to do alot of things he didnt know how to do. My brother dealth with it his own way. My mother blessed you all Myatts before she died. The one thing she told me is that she wanted me to go and love Rachel. She didnt want me to wait around for her to die she gave me her permission to go but I didnt leave till she died. So when Rachel said all those hateful and hurtful things like I didnt enjoy doing things with her, that I was sad, damaged, and mentally ill, those were not only slanderous and libel to my character, they hurt because I did everything in my power to come see her in Jonathan. She didnt appreciate the love I had for her at all especially at the time I was going through. I gave Rachel a promise ring because I loved her. I loved her more than anyone and to be there with Jonathan and play with him and learn about him. When I got home that was all I could talk about. I want you to know just how much I love Rachel and Jonathan. If I didnt truly love Rachel I would have given up long ago but I still believe in her. Howard and Jane if you recieved the package with Rachel's name about the star I had named after her that was a symbol of how much I love your daughter. She was the star in my sky and so was Jonathan and if you couldnt or cant see how much I love her then I dont know what kind of man you want for your daughter. I was willing to do anything go through fire for her and Jonathan. I still would. I want you to know that everyday we dont talk, we dont make peace, and we arent in each others lives it kills a peace of my soul. That is how much Rachel means to me. I would like this to have a happy ending but that is up to Rachel. I have already chosen not to give up on her. If I have to tour North America and sing of my love for her I will to let her and your whole family know how much I care for Rachel and Jonathan. I have written an acoustic story concept album called "Letters to Rachel" in which I want to tell her how much she mean to me. I wish you no harm Myatts, I love Rachel with all my heart and my birthday is April 22 I will be traveling that date but what I want for Easter and for my birthday is peace with my best friend and woman I love more than anything. I love you Rachel so if you or your family is reading this then please know that you mean a lot to me.
Love
B
GOD BLESS ALL
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